I don't want this blog to be my life story. Sometimes I don't understand life but when i think about it long enough...and question why things happen he way they do, the clouds roll away and my mind becomes as clear as a blue sky. This thing called love is a bitch! I love, love. Way too much because I tend to wear my heart not just on my sleeve but on shoes, my pants, my earrings etc. I really don't think that's a bad thing but i guess since I am going to wear my heart as a wardrobe, I should prepare myself emotionally for a break down. But my question is, how in the hell can u prepare for such a disaster!?? How can you devour your self in another human being for them to just give up and want someone better for themselves? The sad thing is, I've made someone feel like this before but it wasn't intentional and sometimes it was. Being younger and not wise, my motto was " you hurt me, i hurt you". But as u grew up and realized that the shit u put out in life, does indeed come back. Whether its positive or negative, everything comes back full circle. Life is a big circle aka the circle of life. Simba knew all about it.
I've always been ready for marriage and a meaningful relationship, ever since I was a kid. The broken hearts Ive had, made me stumble on the way. I just want to be blissfully happy, with a man who will love and crave me like no other before. I want to be someone to a man where he can say, "where have you been all my life". My body would tingle and giggle if I ever heard that again. I know I'm a great wife and girlfriend. My experiences have mold me into the woman I am today. Even this heart break....this heart break is nooo joke!! He is and forever will be my everything. I would run where ever he wants me to run. He has my heart captivated, forever. I don't think i could ever reject him if he asked me to come back to him. Even though his temper sucks sometimes, but mine does too....he is one of the greatest men I have ever dated and married (2nd marriage), child on the way (5 months preggo). As a stay at home mom for the second time, I am scared shit less to just move on and get my career started. He leaves to Korea 2 months after our baby is born and he's gonna be gone for a year. I'm hoping he'll get a clue out there. I am hands down the best woman he has ever had in his life....he said so himself. His job is so stressful, he has no time for himself. I completely understand that but when u have a family, its called sacrifice. I have no time to myself with a 2 year old, as a stay at home mom. I barely have time to take a long shower and relax after wards. I want to disappear!! Go to a place where the beer flows like wine and swim in a never-ending ocean without tiring. I am so stressed with this news and its too much for my heart to bare.
Does someone know a disappearing act??
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